The man at the full service toll booth told me “you’re very pretty. Are you married? I would like to marry you.” Then he gave me too much change. The extra $.30 feels way more exciting than the proposal
at work the walls of the bathroom stalls go all the way to the ground so my wheels aren’t visible and I can HIDE on the toilet as long as I don’t make any noise. so I do it all the time, of course. I’ve heard a couple of secret conversations (!) and a few big farts (!!). this feels like a really big deal to me. (I need a more exciting job)
Today at work
I’m dealing with an adult woman who writes “~~” in the body of her emails before all the words. And puts ellipses instead of periods. AND DOESN’T CAPITALIZE ANYTHING. I don’t know how to handle this in a professional manner
Some days I wake up and I look so good that I wish I had a boyfriend/husband to see how great I look but other mornings I’m like the least attractive person to wake up. where is the balance
I LOVE workplace drama
mostly because I’m never in the middle of it. because why is anyone going to fight with me, seriously. I love everyone so much.
BUT TODAY I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF IT
AND IT MIGHT LAST A FEW DAYS.
IT IS VERY EXCITING
I LOVE/also strongly dislike MY JOB.
Last night I nicknamed Achilles “Stone Cold Steve Austin” because she wouldn’t lay next to my head while I was sleeping. It’s a mouthful but it’s worth it. This one might stick
I taught Achilles about Jesus Christ to make sure she’ll go to heaven with me when she dies
(I AM VERY BORED AT HOME)
Kris is coming home
Kris is coming home
Kris is coming home
Kris is coming home
Kris is coming home
Diva used to be the first dance I’m going to do when I can dance again (such good choreography) but this is my new goal.
a
little
more fitting since I’m a white girl
Achilles shakes to death every time we’re in the car but tonight I DISCOVERED. She stopped shaking when I turned on Beyonce and she started shaking when I turned it off. For real. all hail the queen
I started calling Achilles “Baby John” this morning and it’s so funny I can’t stop
Now that Achilles has a haircut she looks like a young boy and I started calling her Baby John again. SHE RESPondS to it