-- we're moving this week, so I'm uncovering a bunch of old stuff. 

found -  goals for one night, April 21st. attn: ignite a divorce; convince someone you are their sister then invite on a date; lose 3 pounds

I think about other people’s death a lot, since I was a teenager. Not KILLING other people, but with them dying early. Specifically Achilles when we go to sleep at night. I get scared she won’t be alive when I wake up, so I rub her and rub her and rub her until my hand hurts and I’m asleep. My fears benefit others, but they rule me

My mom just said she loves me more than poop, so. How much does yours love you?

(my other sponsor child got married) (?) so I just started sponsoring the most beauuutiful girl through Compassion International. Trying to write her a letter and I can’t stop being awkward. I just can’t. It took 20 minutes to write 4 lines then I attached a picture of Achilles, so maybe that'll help

"you're really pretty. I wish I could be with you"

"your smile is good. how do you have fun?"

"what kind of games do you play outside?"

somebody help

Someone named CRUNCHY CHLAMYDIA friend requested Christopher on Discord. (he blocked them, for some reason tho)

I’ve called Christopher “Baby Joe” six times today I don’t know why but it’s so funny. I love them both so much I can’t keep them straight. It’s sweet, if you think about it?

I went to a restaurant for dinner and ordered just brussel sprouts (?). Thought the man at the table next to us literally pooped his pants. Then the smell followed us out the door. Then into my car. THEN I REALIZED it’s my takeout box of sprouts. Hahahaha, it smells like actual poop

The most exciting things in my life right now are

1. moving houses in less than a month

2. submitted manuscript for book #4

3. marathon season is coming up and I’m doing 2, maybe 3 this year

4. how soapy my hands get when I wash them for at least 20 seconds and how good that feels. and it’s free

Christopher and I pulled our back muscles at the same time it was so cute

Where some other(/the average?) couple might take a shower and put on some kind of sexy or appealing lingerie for Thor spouse at bedtime, I take a shower and rub Vaseline on my whole face. My entire face, 3 layers, so it doesn’t soak in until long after we’re asleep. It’s my favorite part of the day don’t expect me to give that up

I had a nightmare that Christopher was yelling and throwing shoes at me, so my heart rate was in the fat burn zone.

- I have a large pile of (9 pairs of) shoes in the middle of our bedroom floor that I'm probably feeling guilty about not throwing away. procrastination**

- but I got to the fat burn zone so can we do this again

Some girls have “period underwear,” but I have “period pajamas.” These are my pajamas that are so uglybutcomfy that it doesn’t matter Christopher isn’t attracted to me because I’m on my period anyway. so I can be comfy and ugly. I’m gamin the system over here

Christopher says he can smell that I’ve been eating Doritos (“from across the room,” but I’m not believin that) He says the same thing about my Oreos but I put them in the FREEZER now so there’s no stopping me

I push on Christopher to wake him up when he snores at night, but then I lay there petrified that I’ve woken him up. Then I’m awake because I’m going through all these emotions, and here I am typing a blog post under my covers at 3am

(This may not sound significant, but it is because I wear a lotta t shirts)

I officially buy one size up from the size I wear because I care more about being comfy than looking just right. Subconsciously I did it, consciously I’m applauding myself

One of my favorite parts of living with Christopher is how he doesn’t fuss at me for how long my shower are (avg. 16 minutes). It’s like I wash every strand of hair separately

I have a strong** aversion to taking medication pills, but I’ll take 25 vitamins every morning gladly. I’m only taking 5 now, though, and Achilles is taking 2. Every time I enter the bathroom I want to swallow a vitamin

My favorite part of the day is nighttime when I can put on my pajamas and Vaseline alllll over my face. like a slime princess, all over. Try it!!

The day after* a long bike ride is the best because I can justify wearing a less cute and more comfy tshirt, sleeping past 8am, and watching tv during the day (but I don’t do this one because what even would I watch). 13.4 miles yesterday! I’m chasing the body pains

Some girls have “period underwear,” but I have Period Pajamas (my ugliest but also most comfortable pajamas) because now that I’m married it’s a waste to look cute when I’m on my period. AMIRIGHT

So Christopher knows my cycle just judging on if I wear the navy grandma shirt or not