I tricked the cute boy at Staples to making plans with me this weekend. He’s the one that printed my Beyoncé baby shower pictures so he knows I’m a crazy person. TRICKED HIM.
I gave my ant babies 2 pumpkin seeds and I think some of them died because of the salt. I want to discuss this with someone
newest way to woo me:
ask to see my ant farm, or just talk about them. I love these guys (60)
I just got out of going to dinner with an attractive man by saying “I look like woo, though”
HAHAHAHA
he responded by saying “still a kissable woo,” which was a good response. But no
I took advantage of quality toilet paper my whole life but then
I bought
4 rolls for $.59 at Aldi and it WON’T TEAR. (such a good deal, though)
There’s a dead fly in front of my bedroom door and my front door that have been there for 3 days. I don’t want to pick them up BECAUSE DIRTY so I’m hoping Achilles will just eat them to get it over with
I’ve made a comic (for my new book) out of all the dates I’ve had for the past 3 months and I’m realizing that the only reason I want to go on dates anymore is to make a comic out of them. so hopefully they’re all really bad so I can have a good story
looking, always looking for reasons to get excited about dating again
the guy I went on a date with tonight said “can I see the comic if you make one about our date?” and I had to change the subject/not respond because he might be really bummed if I showed him what I drew
note: in the third box he’s telling me to “use other people’s sympathy to get them to open the door for you.”
dude said that 3 TIMES until I called him out. so funny and bad
A man [whom I didn’t recognize but he recognized me] passed me on the sidewalk in Richmond and called “Achilles Jones.” When I turned around he said he couldn’t remember my name but he remembers Achilles’ name. (success)
He interviewed me for a video project last month and I had Achilles with me of course. she stole the show
I went on 3 dates today.
THREE
DATES
in one day.
one loves anime and is moving to China; one never stopped talking and bouncing; and one was attractive and a vegan on the week days. I don’t get excited about this stuff anymore
I’ve made a comic (for my new book) out of all the dates I’ve had for the past 3 months and I’m realizing that the only reason I want to go on dates anymore is to make a comic out of them. so hopefully they’re all really bad so I can have a good story
looking, always looking for reasons to get excited about dating again
the guy I went on a date with tonight said “can I see the comic if you make one about our date?” and I had to change the subject/not respond because he might be really bummed if I showed him what I drew
I have a friend named Jennifer and if I talk to her/am around her for long enough I get Jenny From The Block by Jennifer Lopez stuck in my head. IT’S HORRIBLE
Playing with Achilles’ heart
I tell her I love her all the way to Pluto and back but Pluto is it a planet anymore so technically my love is nonexistent. She’ll never figure that out
I matched with a cutie on Bumble whose profile says “only Spanish.” Meaning this dude doesn’t speak English. I’m up for the challenge? It has been 20 minutes and I haven’t unmatched him yet (rarely happens. seriously) and 🙌🏼 Google Translate
I just sold a book to the guy that came to my house trying to sell me pest-control. HA. When the customer becomes the vendor He was also very cute so I followed him in my car to give him a water bottle. It was creepy (who’s surprised??)
I’ve made a comic (for my new book) out of all the dates I’ve had for the past 3 months and I’m realizing that the only reason I want to go on dates anymore is to make a comic out of them. so hopefully they’re all really bad so I can have a good story
looking, always looking for reasons to get excited about dating again
easy, free ways to add fun in your day
. transfer into/out of your wheelchair from the opposite direction.
. fall to the ground and get back in your chair with your eyes closed.
. take apart/reassemble your wheelchair (to drive a car) without bending your wrists.
. caterpillar-rolling into bed from your collaterally parked wheelchair
sometimes - rarely, but sometimes - paralyzed people have more fun
good thing Dad dated 400 girls in high school/college because some of them are buying my book now
my friend frowny-Brenda at the post office
used to only frown at me.
but last time I went in there I called her “my girl” and she smiled - I saw she has braces.
today I went in and called said “hello pretty girl” and “I’m happy to see you” and she smiled BIGGER, I saw she has rubber bands in her braces.
I don’t know what the next step is. I might have to kiss her soon
progress: I invited her to my party (she couldn’t come but accepted the invitation with a smile), she waves to me when I come in, remembered Achilles’ name, and remembered my name.
moral of the story: learning people’s names makes a difference&accelerates friendship. I didn’t even have to kiss her but I still might
(jk) (or am I?)