I thought mom was eating potato chips and I was wondering why she was so hungry but I opened my eyes and it is raining
I don’t accept friend requests from people I don’t know on Facebook anymore (lesson learned: there is definitely such thing as a wheelchair fetish) so I just let the requests sit in my inbox to see how many will add up.
as of today, 21. Twenty one! some of them have sent me creepy sexual messages as follow up, but most are just other people in wheelchairs - trying to be “in community” maybe. it’s a nice effort but I’m scared of the fetish
Achilles and I made the Randolph-Macon alumni magazine (the fame, the fortune). I sent them the picture of Achilles screaming. just as a joke
when I ride my handcycle I turn into A DIFFERENT person. Today:
1. rode for 2.25 hours without a shirt on. Kristin whaaat. Stopped and talked with so many people. They didn’t patronize me, which was nice.
2. screamed the sentence “dis weather is good” like ebonics to men in a porch. I picked up a new dialect. Then I waved my hands off and kept going.
3. Riding with my elbows up to air out my armpits because I saw someone doing that once at a soccer game. I don’t sweat. who am I
I discovered neighborhood attached to mine that’s HUGE, which is great news for my handcycling, but also today while I was riding I got 2 shoutouts from men on their porches (2 different houses. one topless man, one shirted), saw one butt crack, and got the name of an acupuncturist in Richmond that “can cure disabilities” (shoutout to my new friend Giselle).
Achilles and I are lost in this neighborhood right now. I’m so happy
I had drinks tonight with a girl named Taylor so I nicknamed her Tequila Taylor and it’s good, I’ve addressed her at least 35 times. I tried to make “Kinky Kristin” a thing but nobody caught on. Marielle said I “have to earn” my nickname and that’s scary so I let it go
“Right now I’m on tennis, rowing, handcycling, and archery teams so I think I should wait until summer to sign up for horseback riding. By then I’ll only be doing handcycling, lacrosse, and road racing.”
I just spoke about myself at an elementary school and the teacher bought Greater Things to read to her second grade class.
so
that’s
really
cool.
Audrey and I made “Vision Boards” but if you look really closely mine just says “BEYONCÉ” with a bunch of black people standing below it. Do I aspire to be Beyoncé? I missed the point of the exercise.
“Kristin you look really good.”
and I said thank you, thank you.
“Yeah last time I saw you, you had a belly like me. You’re more in shape now.”
-Aaron, the cable guy.
HAHAHAHA thanks for the compliment?? (I’ve never had a belly. What is he talking about.)
This was exciting
I’m either going to buy a new computer or a finger monkey. someone please tell me the right thing to do
I bought a new computer. If I get a remote job, though, I’m getting a finger monkey. I’mgonnadoit. (I might do it. what if I do!!!!!!!!!)
I had my body measured for ordering a bridesmaid dress and I’m excited about my measurements BUT I CAN’T TELL ANYONE BECAUSE WHO DOES THAT. if anyone wants to know the circumference of my bust, waist, hips, though, ask me. Please ask me
I talked to an attractive man on Bumble for about an hour then accidentally called him “lil mama” and he stopped responding to me. HAHAHAHAHA wooing is hard (too hard) (I give up but it’s fine)
sometimes I wake up and my hair looks so funny/ugly that I wish I had a committed boyfriend to send a picture to so we can laugh at me then still be in love. but I realize that is a very tall order.
Now that I own a pair of boots, one of the most exciting feelings of my day is when my heel slidesinsosmoothly. Is that a paralyzed-thing or a boot-thing?