I put my number in Kirk’s phone as “Big Booty Ho Beale” last night and forgot to change it back and forgot I did it until he reminded me. So there’s a glass of wine
I just went on a Monday-for-lunch date that I thought didn’t go reaaaally great (I’m just not into him) but he texted me on the way home and said “that was the best date I’ve ever been on” and “I’ll buy you blueberries anytime” so now I’m reconsidering. I love blueberries
I accidentally told him I love his son and now he keeps sending me pictures, like lots of pictures. his kid is ugly-cute
exciting news but first a break-down
500 books came in 18 boxes, which is about 27 books per box.
1 book party, a big delivery, and few pre-ordered books sent turns 18 boxes into 3.5 boxes, which is about 94 books.
That means I sold 406 books so far in under 3 weeks.
The exciting news is I just ordered 500 more books and I have 3 speaking events and 1 more party to attend. My life is the best right now
I just went on a Monday-for-lunch date that I thought didn’t go reaaaally great (I’m just not into him) but he texted me on the way home and said “that was the best date I’ve ever been on” and “I’ll buy you blueberries anytime” so now I’m reconsidering. I love blueberries
the kids next door used to come over all the time and play with Achilles on my porch (and also walk into my house uninvited) then one day I told them to be careful because one day I might be naked in my house AND I HAVE LITERALLY NOT SEEN THEM SINCE. it’s like I scared them away and I don’t know if that’s an insult?
every time someone brings up my book, how much they like it, etc. I happy-cry. I’ve happy-cries LIKE 300 TIMES in the past week. people are so nice to me
A guy in my bible study kept saying the word “duty” and it was so hard to stop secret-laughing. I am 8 years old
sometimes I want to hug Achilles really tight but I don’t because I’m scared I’ll break her rib or skull. Her skull is so small and I don’t want to give her an SCI
I went to bed early last night only for the reason that I could wake up faster and eat unsweetened coconut flakes on my yogurt. It sounds like I’m kidding but I’m not. everyone please
Benefit of wearing Christmas socks in March
the tips are red so no one will noticed my toes are bleeding!
that is also a con
500 of my books are being delivered by UPS to my house today (!) and also there’s construction in my culdesac so every time I hear a truck I rush to the window and see if it’s them. I even got out of the shower once because CONVINCED it was UPS (it wasn’t). This is excitement I’ve never felt
so I celebrated with a chocolate bar, a last-minute first date, and a gay bar.
(I don’t like chocolate) (the guy was weird) (I love gay bars)
I’ve been excited about drinking wine alone inmy house for a long itme but I’ve never actually done it. BUT TONIGHT i’M CELEBRATING (my books. the cover feels like Jergens body lotion). also I think I just got myself a last-minute first date tonight but I’ve been drinking os I don;t know what to do
I’m spending this Valentine’s Day planning a trip to Moscow alone next year (at the end of this year?). embracing/accepting this loneliness
BOOKED - 2018 Carnival cruise to Grand Turk, Puerto Rico, St Kitts, St Marteen.
I’m going with friends, but I’ll have a cabin to myself at least. very excited
I’ve started to write poetry about the dates I go on because why not. it’s the only good thing I get out of them and I go on too many. (despondent)
last night we went to SILVER DINER and I ordered A SIDE OF VEGETABLES because it was 9:00pm. I think this guy was gay.
I’m spending this Valentine’s Day planning a trip to Moscow alone next year (at the end of this year?). embracing/accepting this loneliness
Popcorn is definitely not for sharing.
Popcorn is for realizing how wide your mouth can actually get.