Whenever I shave my legs I feel like I’m starting a new chapter in my life. This chapter is called Brut

Douglas bought me a ukulele!!!!!!!!!!!

CAUGHT. this is my new Christmas exchange present and she contaminated it as soon as I got it to my room. :-/

Dad just said “smh” in real life

I bought Achilles a HOOF that’s as big as her head. how strange
((thank you Leslie))

trying to eat Achilles head. we had fun tonight

I bought Achilles a new dress for Christmas! first she pouted then she screamed at me

leery-eyed Christmas baby

while I was at work Mom cut Achilles’ head and not her body so now she looks like a thumb

Dad gave Achilles a winter scarf from a bottle of Makers Mark! I forced her to sleep in it last night

I was in the world for 12 full hours today and nobody told me my mascara smeared down to reach my upper lip

kristinbeale:

I am a foster parent!!!!$

I remember writing this but I don’t remember why. I’m sorry. I am not going to be a foster parent

I am a foster parent!!!!$

it is an Achilles Jones Christmas

I’m getting both of my hamsters names tattooed on my wrists to honor their death

I told Dad my body is frozen under my covers [because it is cold in this house] and he started singing the Let It Go song. that terrible Let It Go song

I can be just lying in bed then I think about when Achilles threw up on my lap and I laugh out loud

Rusty put us in the paper! everyone find my name this is your challenge

Mom and I had nachos for dinner last night and I kept trying to fit the whole tortilla triangle in my mouth without breaking it so it scratched both of my tiny mouth creases. I am in pain now but it was worth it. high five

Kristin.  I made up a song about tortillas.
Leelee.  What is it?
Kristin.  Well, it’s more of a wrap.

an award-winning pun I said to Leelee and she didn’t laugh, told me “Kristin don’t tell that to Douglas. You might lose him. Let it be our secret.”

again I go unnoticed