tortillas

I remember I thought I friend-zoned myself when Douglas didn’t kiss me until the end of the third date but it was because he asked Google and it told him that was the right time to do it

Tavarris found out about my spasm that I can’t control when people throw/act like they’ll hit or throw something at me so he kept doing it “to desensitize” me but instead I fell out of my chair and I’m wearing a skirt and good thing I was wearing underwear today/I wear underwear every day I promise.

AN OFFICE OF BULLIES

I love my family so much it’s like I don’t know how to say it in a way everybody will understand

upcoming insult: “a huge diaper baby.”
who is going to receive it that’s the question

Douglas is taking me to lunch today so Leelee squinted her eyes and said I shouldn’t order a salad because I don’t have manners while I eat it.
“I’m trying to hold on to this boyfriend for you but you keep doing things to push him away.”
I don’t know how to politely eat a salad and everyone else does

I’m going to Indiana for my honeymoon thank you Amanda

hey Mr. Scott. whatcha gonna do? whatcha gonna do? make our dreams come true

I made a friend in the FOREVER LONG line at the Loft outlet and I told her I’m a lawyer and she believed me. I didn’t mean to lie but she believed me oh my gosh

I’m home alone and keep yelling out “MOHIB”. it just makes me feel good and Achilles responds

I tried to stop eating desserts until my marathon at the end of the month but I made friends with the chef at the Courtyard Cafe and he keeps bringing me new desserts to try- banana bread yesterday, pumpkin&cream cheese muffin today. wow people are nice and I am not ready for 26.2

I’m shopping with Julie for a wedding in two weeks and she said “Kristin you’re an adult you have to start dressing like an adult.”
HAHAHA I THOUGHT I ALREADY DO BUT MAYBE NOT OOPS

I text messages Julie “olly olly oxen free” because I was trying to find her and she didn’t acknowledge it, didn’t laugh. it’s like I threw away a bar of gold

Boleman has mood lighting in the men’s bathroom

A client called in the office to say she is thinking about me because she was here when I heard Gran died and wanted to “give her regards” and say she’s “so sorry for my loss.”
WOW PEOPLE ARE REALLY NICE

a collection of Achilles candids. everyone enjoy

A client of Boleman (I work) is now trying to get a mortgage from Townebank Mortgage (Dad works) and we have to work with Townebank now. FAMILIAL RELATIONSHIP BECOMES BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP. things will have to change
Dad —> Mr. Beale for starters

Achilles and I are watching football

Russell Wilson played football for the Tuckahoe Tomahawks while I was a cheerleader does that make me famous

Douglas wants us to dress up as Jimi Hendrix and Noel Redding for Halloween guess which one I get to be

I’m trying to convince him to be a set of dice we’ll see how that goes