Mom came home from the office party alone and says “Dad is still at the party dancing and photobombing everybody.”
hahahahhaha
Mom and Dad going to a Christmas party, leaving me home alone. SHOULDN’T IT BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND
I told Mom she is bad at communication and she started crab-walking around the kitchen saying he’s going I make a sequel to Les Miserables called Les Momables
I saw Lincoln today and fell asleep twice, heads up everyone
JULIA I LOOKED FOR LUKE SO MUCH BUT DIDN’T SEE HIM. probably snoozed right through it
I’m eating alone at the sushi restaurant tonight, trying to look like I’m doing something important on my phone BUT ALL I’M REALLY DOING IS LOOKING AT YOUR REBLOGGED PICTURES OF BOOTYS. but my waiter is so attractive. no regrets
